Befriending the Truth

In order to be a real artist one needs to tap into their truth. And this lady can be ugly as hell, dark as a starless night, she can hurt, cut you in pieces, squeeze your heart with gross hands and make it hard for you to breathe. You prefer to keep her locked in a cellar and never mention her name during family meetings. You act as if she’s never existed and behave in a way not to let her “disturb” your peace, when what you need to is do is exactly the opposite.

By letting her see the sun light and meet your family members you take care of what others thought was a crippled part of you. Continue reading

Stickers

When I was a kid I got a precious gift from my Mum’s friend from Italy. No one in the class had such a thing. It made other kids jealous and it made me think that it’s so extraordinary that I should take very good care of it, meaning hide it and not use it. It was an album win special gloss paper and some stickers inside which you could easily stick and unstick. These stickers were so beautiful, so much different from what I used to know, they were in the forms of bears, dinosaurs, angels, some had glitters on them, some had the 3D effect. In one word, they were priceless.

It was my dream to stick them all around the room, on the furniture, in my school books, on the bike, mirror, walls and doors…everywhere. But I didn’t. I didn’t allow myself. I took the album out of the closet sometimes and went through pages with a heavy breath in the silence of my undecorated room and I was sad.

Some years later, when I grew out of silly colorful toys, during a cleaning of the house before Xmas I found the album. And I froze. All of the stickers were still there. And it hit me. WHAT A WASTE! When I found them and was brave enough to make use of them I no longer wished to do so. I realized that I deprived my younger self of that pleasure.

Now that I am an adult and each time I notice I am denying myself a treat, some fun or worse, the right to fulfill my need, I go back to that story of and remind myself  that the time is now. There are thoughts that pass my mind like: “maybe later I would have more money to travel to some faraway land”, “maybe in the next decade I would be more fit for some activities and jobs, because now I should focus on the career and my relationships”…but I know, that if there’s something I really wanna do and I don’t, it will stick with me for long…but rather as regret than a soul warming memory.


PS It’s never too late to spoil one’s inner child. Today I discovered they had an entire stickers section in a Chinese market.  I felt like a kid again, but with a wallet of an adult 😉 So I got myself these:

SAMSUNG DIGITAL CAMERA

Ratio price/satisfaction – to the moon and back!!!